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Revision......[mumbles]

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It's hard out here for a pen these days all our jobs have been taken by dirty stinking computers those [Pen complaining about lack of jobs]

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show-offs with their spellcheck and their copy and paste huh we used to be

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kings I tell you if you ever had to revise something you'd have to turn to

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us revision is when you take a piece of writing mess around with it and then

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magically transform it into something better so basically like an ambush [Woman having her hair done]

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makeover I guess your first shot at writing a paper is known as a first

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draft but no one bats a thousand heck if you hit it out of the park half of the

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time you'd be the greatest baseball player ever though you can't turn back

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time and take another swing at the ball you can take a second shot at writing an [Girl receives essay back]

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essay here's how you do it you take your first draft perform some linguistic

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surgery and then produce a second draft which will most definitely be better

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than the first if it's still not perfect you repeat the process again for a third [Third draft essay stamped better]

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draft or a fourth or in case of my fantasy fanfic The Pens of Mordor a two

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hundred and twenty seventh draft the exact number of drafts isn't all that

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important though what is important is that revision was the tool you use to [Person picks up revision spanner from toolbox]

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create your masterpiece so how exactly do we get our toes wet with revision

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before editing something it's helpful to wait a couple of days so you can look at

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the piece with fresh eyes revision is like running into your ex at a coffee [Man and girl grab same cup of coffee]

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shop things can get weird if you haven't taken enough space basically taking some

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space between writing and revising allows you to look at the piece as if

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you were a random reader looking at it for the first time now that you've taken

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a break it's time to kick it into action your first step is to find your main [Woman in a swimming pool and dives in]

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point which if you're looking to score brownie

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points with your lit teacher is also known as a thesis so your main point

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could be that literature is an important subject to study or on the contrary that

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literature is the worst subject ever really a main point can be anything as

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long as it's an argument you can even argue that Chris Hemsworth is the most [Photographer snaps Chris Hemsworth]

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beautiful man of all time if you felt like it

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well you might already have a precise idea of your main point before you start

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for many people it doesn't come into clear focus until after they've started

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writing or even revising for example you might know from the get-go that you're [Woman thinking of a whale]

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writing a paper about killer whales but still be unsure about your specific main

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point there are tons of options you could write about the way that killer

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whales evolved over time or you could write about their high level of

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intelligence or you could even discuss their mating habits if you want to go

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there so as long as you look at your first draft pay attention to which parts [Girl assessing her first draft]

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pop out the most which ones have the most compelling evidence as in

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interesting citations from reliable sources like a chapter from a killer

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whales biography if it existed and of course which parts of your papers

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stimulate the most muscle growth second you want to identify your readers and [Man exercising in a gym]

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your purpose many people don't think about their audience when writing but

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it's one of the most important things you can do for example if you were

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writing that paper on killer whales mating habits you'd write completely [Woman discussing essay on stage]

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different if it was for an audience of professional scientists you'd use a lot

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of high-end scientific lingo right if you were writing for elementary school

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students on the other hand you'd keep the language much simpler and easy to

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digest and if you were writing for a bunch of preteens well you might just

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want to stick with emojis in each instance you'd use totally different

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language to talk about the exact same subject matter related to this is the

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purpose of your paper don't get purpose confused with main idea however also [Main idea and purpose sticky notes appear]

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don't get it confused with porpoise which is a completely different animal

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your purpose is what you want to achieve with your writing so with your paper on

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killer whales your purpose might be to explain the distribution of their

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population advocate for a better environmental policies or

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show that killer whale exchange didn't that you're down for the cause despite [Man approaches a killer whale]

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having the same idea these three papers would end up totally different based on

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their respective purposes the third step in this revision process is to evaluate

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your evidence does that citation claiming that killer whales listen to

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the weekend while getting down come from a good source or is it coming from [Whales listening to radio]

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someone untrustworthy a good source is like a good friend it'll always give you

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support when you need it and a bad source well that's like mistaking your

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worst enemy for your best friend so how do we know if a source is worthy of [Batman and Joker appear]

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inclusion in a paper well first it's got to be true you don't want to find a

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source that claims for example that killer whales are a type of bird thanks

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a lot Wikipedia or that pencils are anywhere near as effective as pens just

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ignorant it also must come from a reliable trustworthy source an

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award-winning news publication like the nation, the National Review or NPR

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probably trustworthy a conspiracy theory blog hosted by an unemployed dog walker [Woman appears in a small room with a dog]

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from Kentucky hmm not so much now being reliable doesn't mean that these sources

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are 100% accurate each of them is biased in their own way all reliability means

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is that we doubt the source is going to straight-up lie to us you also want to [Man sitting on a couch and thunderstorm strikes]

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make sure that your research gets along with the main point and purpose of your

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paper which might force you to make some difficult cuts during the revision [Pieces of paper land in the trash]

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process for example you might be writing a paper on Abraham Lincoln's rarely

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discussed wrestling career which isn't even a joke when you find an amazing

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source that describes how Lincoln felt when writing the Gettysburg Address it's

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a great source reliable and full of rich detail but there's a problem [Book appears open]

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it doesn't have jack to do with Lincoln's career as the Hulk Hogan of

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the 1800s so we have to cut it although it's sad to see such an awesome source

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fall by the wayside and you'll ultimately have a better paper as a

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result on a similar note it's important to only keep what's important to the

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overall paper so even if you somehow wrote the best paragraph of all time [Man holding up a essay paper]

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so beautiful that it causes anyone who reads it to weep uncontrollably you'd

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still have to cut it from your paper if it wasn't integral to the argument being

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made I'm not saying it's easy killing off your favorite paragraph is like

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picking which one of your children you want to give away next up focus on [Hand points to daughters and son]

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cleaning up your language and no I'm not just talking about removing cuss

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words now that we've taken care of the big-picture stuff like the main idea and

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purpose we can start focusing on the nitty-gritty details, revising sentences

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to make them flow better

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reorganizing your paragraphs to better deliver

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information and making sure that all your transitions are as slick as a stick

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of butter after you've tightened up the language

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you want to focus on grammar spellcheck is great and all but it's not a silver [Theater production appears as curtains drawn back]

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bullet that'll magically make your paper read like Shakespeare so don't just take

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GoogleDocs word for it read through your paper one more time making sure that all

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your sentences are grammatically correct sweeping the pages for misspellings and

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typos and ensuring that the punctuation is as on point as the latest Drake

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single feels like you've just run a marathon right well keep hustling [Man running a marathon]

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because we're almost to the finish line our last revision step will be to read

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through your paper one last time not as a writer but as a reader just like you

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took some space between writing and revising you should take a quick [People sitting down watching TV]

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breather before looking over the paper one last time this trick will help you

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forget that you even wrote the paper helping you to see it as a new reader

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might and guess what you're now done with your first round of revision most

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essays require more than one draft before they're perfect [Fourth draft stamped perfect]

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hey what are you gonna do even the iPhone needed a couple of revisions to

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get right so maybe you'll have to repeat this revision process one more time or

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two more times or a dozen though you might be getting a bit excessive at that

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point if you follow these steps and stay focused we guarantee that you'll end up [Steps for revision list appears]

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with a better paper than you ever thought possible another important part

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of revision is peer feedback dealing with feedback can be frustrating

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since it's easy to interpret constructive criticism as insult

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especially when you've just poured your heart and soul into a piece of writing [Person empties trash can onto essay]

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but take a second and breathe because feedback can turn out to be quite useful

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during the revision process after all we've talked about how important it is

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to read your writing as if you were a new reader approaching it for the first

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time feedback is great because you can literally see how new readers feel

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feedback can be harsh but the harsher the better like an upstart football [Man running with a football]

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player you're not going to reach the big leagues without taking a few hits but

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take any feedback you get with a grain of salt

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sometimes a reader might just be trying to conform your writing to their

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personal style at others they might simply hate the subject you're writing

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about hence the important of evaluating

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feedback you've got to make sure it's quality before putting it into practice [Person drops feedback notes into trash]

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for example if someone gives you feedback that they didn't understand the

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bit about how killer whales select their mates now it would be helpful feedback

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while feedback that killer whales are dumb and you should write about sharks

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instead is well not so helpful finally there's the implementation of feedback

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when implementing feedback you don't necessarily want to do exactly what your [Pen discussing feedback]

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peer suggested you can of course but it's sometimes better to think about the

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ideas behind their feedback are they telling you to cut the section on killer

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whale anatomy because it's confusing? well you might just need to clarify your

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writing are they saying a fictional character should make a different [People watching Joker and Batman on TV]

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decision maybe you just need to flesh them out

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better in any case the key to using feedback to revise your writing is to

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approach the situation with an open mind rather than feeling seething rage [Woman's head opens]

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towards anyone who dare insult your masterpiece not that I've ever done that

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while there are tons of resources for writing assistance the best might be

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Purdue University's OWL site which is an acronym for the online Writing Lab not

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an all knowledgeable bird..OWL can do it all it can serve as a style guide give

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you tips for writing researching and revising your writing and even help you

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write resumes and cover letters when applying for jobs so naturally I'd

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highly recommend that you bookmark this sucker ASAP oh you can just get the [Woman having address tattooed on forehead]

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address tattooed across your forehead that way

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you'll always have revision on your mind okay so we've learned that revision is

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all about polishing up a paper until it's shining like a gold grill and is in

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some ways just as important if not more so than the writing process itself we also

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learned that revision should be approached in an organized systematic

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manner to create the best draft possible additionally it's important to think

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like a reader when revising your work it will help you better understand what the [Woman reading a draft essay]

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reader is expecting in our grand finale we learned about the importance of peer

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feedback no matter how annoying it can be when it's happening ironic as it

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sounds this lesson was so good that I wouldn't revise a thing if I had to do

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it again now if you'll excuse me I think I figured out a way to get a job [Pen jumps into an apple]

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realistic right?

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