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Texas EOC English 1: 2.6 Editing 173 Views
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Transcript
- 00:00
Thank you We sneak here's your shmoop du jour brought
- 00:05
to you by debt because nobody likes artists who only
- 00:09
swim in the shallow in ueno We've been there checking
- 00:12
the following passage were skimming quickly representational armament painting proportion
- 00:18
and realize anyone Can jackson moaning watery look because i'm
Full Transcript
- 00:23
here No All right What is the best way to
- 00:29
rewrite sentence twenty and hear the potential answers All right
- 00:36
come on option d we know change can be scary
- 00:38
but in this case while it's necessary for one since
- 00:41
twenty is a run on sentence because it connects to
- 00:44
independent clauses without putting a comma before the conjunction and
- 00:50
secondly it's extremely convoluted and hard to understand this writer
- 00:53
would definitely never work for shmoop there's no way deacon
- 00:56
stay on the list option a can go to as
- 00:59
it isn't any better than the original sense In fact
- 01:01
this version is pretty convoluted on its own right make
- 01:04
matters worse it also forgets to put a comma before
- 01:07
which whenever we see the word witch there's a good
- 01:10
chance that we need to put a comma before it
- 01:12
because which usually introduces a non restrictive cloth Well these
- 01:17
air clauses that don't change the meaning of the sense
- 01:20
of their removed in this version of sense which introduces
- 01:24
a clause that gives us more info on what texture
- 01:27
is But these fun facts aren't totally essential so moving
- 01:31
on c doesn't work either As a matter of fact
- 01:33
this might be the worst version of the sentence yet
- 01:35
so let's dig deeper we don't technically need the comma
- 01:38
before the phrase and helps create death since it's not
- 01:42
an independent Klaus there's No subject in this phrase it's
- 01:45
just the verb create doing its own thing Beyond this
- 01:48
grammatical mistake the layout of the sense makes it hard
- 01:50
to understand texture is the thing that's creating debt Option
- 01:54
b is the only answer that gets it all right
- 01:56
It cures the original sentences case of the run on
- 01:59
by well you know not being a run on more
- 02:02
than anything This version is better organized with a clear
- 02:04
cause and effect It's Easy to understand how the brushstrokes
- 02:07
and thickness of paint add up to make texture which
- 02:11
then equals death So it turns out that already is
- 02:14
more like math And we thought so too bad by 00:02:17.415 --> [endTime] the numbers doesn't count
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