Barista at Busy Restaurant. Salary: $2.13/hour

It's so busy. There are people everywhere. All the time. You feel like you're drowning. You can't rest. It's latte after cappuccino after espresso after cold brew after flat white—you never stop. You make just above minimum wage when you factor in tips at least....

Barista at Big Coffee Chain. Salary: $7.25/hour

You'd think a big chain would be able to cough up some more money for its employees, but what can we say? Life is unfair. It's not too bad—except that it's open twenty-four hours a day and it gets really crowded in the morning. And when the college kids come in to study during your night shifts, they ruin your life by oozing intellectual potential.

Barista at Big Fair Trade Coffee Shop. Salary: $8.00/hour

It's a pretty bougie, but very hip place. The coffee is expensive, so you have no idea how any of these people can afford it, but you're glad they do (and that they always put that extra quarter in the tip jar). There are some mean customers, though. You thought the "fair trade" aspect of your shop would weed out rude people...but they're actually more entitled.

Barista at Seattle-based Coffee Shop. Salary: $15.00/hour

Man, do you love this city. You work in a cool little coffee shop where most people just come to chat or have a relaxed cup of joe, so you don't get uptight jerks too often. You're pretty close with everyone you work with—even your bosses. You've been here about a year now and you're pretty sure a tiny raise is in your future. Thank goodness the minimum wage is already so high.

Head Barista at Seattle-based Chain. Salary: $20.00/hour

You've been the trainee. You've been the barista. Now, you run everything. You arrange the training sessions and figure out the schedules. You don't have to work as often because you can bark orders to the baristas in training. Sometimes you just sit back and insist that little Janey needs more practice pouring coffee by herself. Hmm yes, that's why you're not helping.