How It All Goes Down
- Guert Affenlight—yes, that 60-year-old college president whose name is Guert and who basically lives in a dorm room and is sleeping with a 20-something college student who also lives in a dorm room—decides he doesn't want to live in a dorm room anymore, so he goes to look at a house.
- A house near campus has a "For Sale" sign, and Guert knows the people selling it. They're faculty at Westish.
- They show Guert the house, and even tell him that he can keep their dog, Contango, because they're moving out of the country and can't take it with them.
- "Wow" (59.45) says Affenlight, closing the chapter.