The Comedy of Errors: Act 4, Scene 3 Translation

A side-by-side translation of Act 4, Scene 3 of The Comedy of Errors from the original Shakespeare into modern English.

Original Text	Translated Text
Source: Folger Shakespeare Library
Enter Antipholus of Syracuse, wearing the chain. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE There’s not a man I meet but doth salute me As if I were their well-acquainted friend, And everyone doth call me by my name. Some tender money to me; some invite me; Some other give me thanks for kindnesses; 5 Some offer me commodities to buy. Even now a tailor called me in his shop And showed me silks that he had bought for me, And therewithal took measure of my body. Sure these are but imaginary wiles, 10 And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here. Enter Dromio of Syracuse with the purse. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Master, here’s the gold you sent me for. What, have you got the picture of old Adam new-appareled? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE What gold is this? What Adam dost thou mean? 15 DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Not that Adam that kept the Paradise, but that Adam that keeps the prison; he that goes in the calf’s skin that was killed for the Prodigal; he that came behind you, sir, like an evil angel, and bid you forsake your liberty. 20 ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE I understand thee not. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE No? Why, ’tis a plain case: he that went like a bass viol in a case of leather; the man, sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives them a sob and ’rests them; he, sir, that takes pity 25 on decayed men and gives them suits of durance; he that sets up his rest to do more exploits with his mace than a morris-pike. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE What, thou mean’st an officer? 30 DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Ay, sir, the sergeant of the band; he that brings any man to answer it that breaks his band; one that thinks a man always going to bed and says “God give you good rest.” ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE Well, sir, there rest in your 35 foolery. Is there any ships puts forth tonight? May we be gone? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Why, sir, I brought you word an hour since that the bark Expedition put forth tonight, and then were you hindered by the sergeant 40 to tarry for the hoy Delay. Here are the angels that you sent for to deliver you. He gives the purse. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE The fellow is distract, and so am I, And here we wander in illusions. Some blessèd power deliver us from hence! 45	S. Antipholus is still at the marketplace, waiting for S. Dromio to come tell him about whether any ships are leaving. S. Antipholus wonders at his good luck; it seems everyone in the whole city knows him and is kind to him, though he has no idea who they are. He’s convinced the place is overrun with sorcery. S. Dromio then arrives with the gold to pay E. Antipholus’s debt, and tries to give it to S. Antipholus. S. Dromio then has to explain to the confused S. Antipholus that he was recently arrested, which one would think a person would remember. S. Antipholus, however, just wants to know about the ships he asked S. Dromio to look for. S. Dromio is certain he already told S. Antipholus about a departing ship the last time they spoke, only to be told to bring money for bail instead. S. Antipholus basically gives up. Obviously, both he and his servant have lost it. They're insane and wandering in an illusion.
Enter a Courtesan. COURTESAN Well met, well met, Master Antipholus. I see, sir, you have found the goldsmith now. Is that the chain you promised me today? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE Satan, avoid! I charge thee, tempt me not. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Master, is this Mistress Satan? 50 ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE It is the devil. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Nay, she is worse; she is the devil’s dam, and here she comes in the habit of a light wench. And thereof comes that the wenches say “God damn me”; that’s as much to say “God 55 make me a light wench.” It is written they appear to men like angels of light. Light is an effect of fire, and fire will burn: ergo, light wenches will burn. Come not near her. COURTESAN Your man and you are marvelous merry, sir. 60 Will you go with me? We’ll mend our dinner here. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Master, if you do, expect spoon meat, or bespeak a long spoon. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE Why, Dromio? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Marry, he must have a long 65 spoon that must eat with the devil. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, to the Courtesan Avoid then, fiend! What tell’st thou me of supping? Thou art, as you are all, a sorceress. I conjure thee to leave me and be gone. COURTESAN Give me the ring of mine you had at dinner 70 Or, for my diamond, the chain you promised, And I’ll be gone, sir, and not trouble you. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Some devils ask but the parings of one’s nail, a rush, a hair, a drop of blood, a pin, a nut, a cherrystone; but she, more covetous, would 75 have a chain. Master, be wise. An if you give it her, the devil will shake her chain and fright us with it. COURTESAN I pray you, sir, my ring or else the chain. I hope you do not mean to cheat me so. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE Avaunt, thou witch!—Come, Dromio, let us go. 80 DROMIO OF SYRACUSE “Fly pride,” says the peacock. Mistress, that you know. Antipholus and Dromio exit.	A Courtesan (the amiable wench E. Antipholus went to see at the Porpentine) enters, seeming another vision of the devil. S. Antipholus and S. Dromio joke happily about light, which they pun on. They call the Courtesan light, as the devil himself was an angel of light, and they also twist the notion that the woman is "light," meaning "easy." Finally, they decide that she is light like fire, which will burn. Anyway, the Courtesan talks about the lunch she just had with E. Antipholus, where he took a ring from her worth forty ducats and promised her a gold chain in exchange. She notes S. Antipholus wears the chain, but when she asks for it, or her ring back, he runs away.
COURTESAN Now, out of doubt Antipholus is mad; Else would he never so demean himself. A ring he hath of mine worth forty ducats, 85 And for the same he promised me a chain. Both one and other he denies me now. The reason that I gather he is mad, Besides this present instance of his rage, Is a mad tale he told today at dinner 90 Of his own doors being shut against his entrance. Belike his wife, acquainted with his fits, On purpose shut the doors against his way. My way is now to hie home to his house And tell his wife that, being lunatic, 95 He rushed into my house and took perforce My ring away. This course I fittest choose, For forty ducats is too much to lose. She exits.	The Courtesan, out a ring and a customer, decides she’ll go to his wife, which is a dangerous but useful tactic. The Courtesan is sure Antipholus is mad, and she intends to tell Adriana that Antipholus ran into her house and stole her valuable ring.